What, my dear, is self-love?
To me, it’s like becoming your own lover. Your own best friend. Your own helper and companion.
It’s sitting with yourself in complete silence so you can hear and listen deeply, soaking up every bit of wisdom that arises.
It’s connecting with the essence of who you are and letting this force permeate your being.
It’s knowing yourself intimately — strengths and weaknesses, flaws and perfections, light and dark aspects — and never looking away in shame or guilt.
Every mistake is admitted. There’s no reason to deny doing something “wrong” because you know it doesn’t make YOU wrong. You love yourself enough to correct your mistakes and learn so you can grow and evolve and expand into the truest version of yourself.
When you fall, you pick yourself back up and check for wounds or injuries. You nurse them until you feel strong enough to continue walking. There’s no need to blame or criticize or judge. Pure, radical acceptance of who you are and where you are is the healing balm.
Not a day goes by when you don’t check in with how you are doing. You ask yourself how you feel and what you need. You decide what you want — rather than letting the expectations or desires of others dictate your choices — and ask for what you want because you know you are worthy of living the life of your dreams.
There is a strong commitment to your own truth and to the path of your soul. Nothing will stop you, not even the worst form of rejection or abandonment from another person. Their opinion does not create your own.
When you’re feeling down, you hold yourself in loving arms and offer compassion, tenderness and forgiveness. You allow yourself to cry or rage in a safe container. You wipe your own tears and remind yourself how wonderful you are. It doesn’t matter if you messed up. You are still wonderful. You are still valuable. You are still worthy.
Every belief or fear that stands in your way of being big and abundant and expansive and free is confronted. You don’t shy away from difficulty. You face the biggest fear and walk toward it. You laugh at what tries to stop you from shining your light. You know you are more powerful than the fear, and you will break through barrier after barrier.
There is a desire to fiercely protect yourself from anything or anyone that would limit your true expression. Your body tells you when a boundary has been crossed. Your “no” comes out with a gentle, unwavering roar. Your right to take up space is unquestionable. You have a right to be here exactly as you are. There is no apology. There is no denial. There is no sacrifice.
Everything is a choice, and you own this personal responsibility. Each choice you make is rooted in your body-heart wisdom. The intuition that rises is trusted. You do not need to see external proof of what you already know inside.
You don’t care what others think because you love yourself so much it doesn’t matter. Besides, they’re simply projecting their own inner judgment onto you. It slides off like a droplet of water. Your heart opens in compassion, for it is obvious they fear their own capacity to be free.
It is a priority to give yourself ample rest and time alone to fill your own cup. Nourishing food is both a creative act and a form of connection with the earth. Gratitude fills your heart every time you have the luxury of eating her gifts. When your body wants to move, you let it. There’s a deep relationship between you and your body, one of awe and respect. You let her talk and share all of her beautiful wisdom.
The earth whispers to you in every gust of wind, or the falling of a leaf, or in the way she constantly holds you up as you take one graceful step after another. Your eyes and ears open to her. You recognize the gift she has given you of life, and there is no reason to do anything but live it to the fullest. With every gulp of fresh air, you thank her.
No matter where you are, you hold your hand. You walk with yourself every step of the way and refuse to let go. Because you’ve got your own back. You stay by your side. You catch yourself. There is no reason to forsake the divinity of who you are anymore. Your only task is to anchor fully into your truth and live it boldly.
Let these words sink into your body. Can you say “yes” to yourself? Will you become your own lover?
P.S. I have a Valentine’s Gift for you! Last week, I created a free mini workshop to Unleash Your Truth. It will help you anchor into your body, expand your heart, and open your throat. To receive it directly in your inbox, simply enter your email below or view this page for more information.*
*Set aside at least one hour of time devoted solely to yourself. The workshop will arrive in your inbox shortly, along with preparation instructions.
2 thoughts on “The truest essence of self-love”
Dear Jessica, your post has spoken to me with loving, supportive words. And I hear, “Now is the time to prioritize loving myself!”. Thank you! I appreciate this valuable Valentine’s gift! ❤
Yes, it is!!! Loving ourselves is the greatest gift we can give, not only to ourselves, but to the world! As your love naturally flows within you, it affects everyone and everything around you. ❤️❤️❤️